Heaven is a Lie
by Shadow of an Echo
Summary: Two souls fighting a battle against pain, one turning into a monster, the other drowning in grief, sent on a collision course towards each other. Heaven is a lie, this is reality, and sometimes comfort comes when you least suspect it. Ichigo/Byakuya YAOI!
1. Set Me Free

**Heaven is a Lie**

**Shadow of an Echo**

**Summary:** Two souls fighting a battle against pain, one turning into a monster, the other drowning in grief, one incident sends these two souls on a collision course towards each other. Heaven is a lie, this is reality, and sometimes comfort comes from a place you least suspect. Ichigo/Byakuya, with an additional partner added at the end that shall remain a surprise. This is going to be a short story uploaded in three or four chunks, possibly five but I doubt it as I have four long-range stories I am working on at the same time.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Bleach in any way, all rights belong to Tite Kubo and the many wonderful companies that work hard to bring his vision to print and screen. Thank you so much for the hours of entertainment. In addition, the titles I use for the parts are the chorus for the song Heaven is a Lie by Lacuna Coil. I don't own that either.

**Rating: Mature**

**Warnings: Yaoi! MaleXmale sexuality, **and a surprise** MaleXmaleXmale **pairing towards the end.

**A/N: **This is a Gift fic for Naru894, she has been a faithful reviewer since my DaggersBloodPain days, and to thank her for her loyalty I offered to write her a story. She gave me pairings, I gave her back a few options, and this is what we worked out between us. I hope you like it Naru, I did my best!

**Part One**

**Set Me Free**

His breath caught in his lungs, heart climbing into his throat, a choked scream threatened to tear itself from his mouth. He watched the boy in front of him, moments away from striking a killing blow, transform from the rash Ryoka into a demon. The sickly black and red power swirling around the creature cloying in its toxicity, he felt like a single lungful of the tainted power would send him to his final death.

His moment of shock was just long enough for the monster to get the upper end, barely managing to dodge away from the suddenly much more powerful blows. What was this thing? He felt almost empty, hungry, longing, this brash power thief felt like a Hollow, a surprisingly human Hollow, but Hollow non-the-less.

For the first time since Byakuya Kuchiki had advanced to Captain he felt pure terror run through his veins.

Suddenly the onslaught stopped, the monster halting mid-step, only to begin thrashing around and grabbing at the white mask that had materialized over part of his face, the demonically glowing amber eyes fighting with deep brown for dominance. With an unearthly growl, the mask was ripped off and the same boy he had been fighting stood before him, panting from his efforts fighting off the monster, "If I am going to win, than I want it to be me that does it!" The boy didn't seem to be talking to the Captain when he spoke.

Byakuya forcibly shoved the fear away, he had a job to do, and his honor was on the line. Having chosen honor over family, he was determined to uphold that premise even if he gave up his life in the attempt. It was with that in mind that he challenged Ichigo to another round of fighting. The monster faded to the back of his mind but never left it.

If only Byakuya knew what was going through Ichigo's mind during this time, he might have had the foresight to remember that demon just a little bit clearer.

Ichigo wasn't fighting the monster to save himself, he did it to protect Byakuya. As angry as he was with the elder Kuchiki, it had never been his intention to kill Rukia's brother. Knock some sense into him the hard way, yes, but not kill. Ichigo had honestly been kind of enjoying the fight so far, he may not be as bloodthirsty as Zaraki, but if a fight found him he wouldn't back down. If Ichigo wasn't horribly mistaken, and he really didn't think he was, than he could have sworn Byakuya had been starting to enjoy himself out on the plains. Captains must not get a whole lot of opportunities to fight at full strength, often running around with restrictions on using their Shikai and Bankai, or with a power limiter painted on their skin.

It was the parasite in Ichigo's soul that hungered for Byakuya's death.

Ichigo didn't let himself think about the timing, had the Hollow not come forward he very well might be dead from Byakuya's strike. That didn't matter, what did was the monster almost turned him into a murderer without his consent.

Finally, he was making progress, backing Byakuya into a corner and ready to bash some sense into his skull, when Aizen pulled his stunt. There was barely time to think as he fought against the bastard, only to watch helplessly as the strike aimed for Rukia by Gin flew past him, too far away for him to intercept.

He thought Rukia would be dead for sure, until the blade directed at her heart pierced into a white clad side, sliding deeply into flesh, blood, and bone. Byakuya stumbled back, struggling to stay on his feet as the long blade retracted, hand pressed to the bleeding wound to staunch the flow. He was panting heavily from the pain, but didn't cry out, instead aiming a defiant look at Aizen.

Ichigo was forced to look away from Byakuya as everyone's momentary shock had allowed Yoruichi and her protégé Soi Fon to corner Aizen. A few moments of preaching from the damn bastard passed, until there were three columns of bright yellow light descending from a rip in the sky, the light carrying Aizen and his cohorts away. Leaving Captains, Lieutenants, and Ryoka alike to fight uselessly against the barrier formed by the Hollow removal technique.

Trust the master illusionist to cheat his way out of capture, and there was no doubt in Ichigo's mind Aizen had used the coward's way out.

The aftermath of that one day took time to deal with, wounds needed tending, and friendships needed mending, or in some cases forging. Ichigo found himself healing quickly, he harbored doubts that the speed of his recovery was completely in the hands of the fourth squad, because many people less injured than him were still laid up even as he was wandering around looking for something to do.

He found the distraction he was looking for in the eleventh division. Ikkaku had been recovering at a decent pace and was trying to scrounge up a fight, so Ichigo answered his call. When an overeager Kenpachi didn't interrupt them, they enjoyed a good spar. It was after one of these pulse pounding fights that they found themselves in conversation, almost a week had passed since the incident with Aizen, and Ikkaku wanted to know more about the Ryoka that had managed to beat him before going on to defeat his Captain as well.

They were sitting outside the barracks after finding a nice shady spot. Ikkaku was leaning back wearing only his hakama, with a half full bottle of sake in one hand, letting his muscles cool down from the strain they had been under fighting Ichigo. The orange haired substitute was sitting in a similar position next to him, minus the bottle of sake, he didn't want anything that might slow his reaction time while in range of Kenpachi.

"So Ichigo, where'd you learn to fight?" Ikkaku started off, taking a sip out of the bottle.

Ichigo gave him a funny look, "I already told you, my teacher was Kisuke Urahara."

The elder Shinigami shook his head in disagreement, "Not what I meant, you haven't been a Shinigami long enough to learn everything you know, no one is that good. You have been fighting a long time, anyone in this division could see that easily, so why deny it?"

Ah, now Ichigo understood, "I'm not denying anything, I just didn't think anyone here would care much about what happened before I got drug into this world." His shrug of indifference added credence to his words. "I learned some from formal lessons, but I got a lot better fighting on the streets. It's not easy to keep your temper when you're being harassed daily for something you can't help, such as having orange hair, or a name that sounds like a certain kind of fruit."

"A living world street fighter has a few weeks of sword training, and can defeat our Captain? You have absolutely no idea how rare that is do you? When I first met my Captain I fought him too, and I used to make my living by winning fights in some of the toughest Rukon districts. Yumichika can confirm that as he was there. When I fought the Captain, I lost. I've been working ever since then at being strong enough to gain his approval, and you do it so easily." Ikkaku wasn't whining exactly, but he did take a slightly longer drink from the sake bottle than he had been.

Ichigo couldn't stop the indignant snort, "I almost died, so forgive me if I don't consider that easy. I think of that fight as more of a tie than a victory anyway, we were both pretty beat up after it. If it weren't for Zangetsu I probably would have bled to death before I figured out how to cut him." He responded to the main part of Ikkaku's statement, until a lesser part caught his attention, "Wait, Yumichika was in the seedy Rukon districts? You're talking about the same guy who prances around like a peacock?"

Ikkaku burst out laughing, "If he heard you say that he would either preen more, or attack you. His personality is not a new development, he has always acted a bit flamboyantly, if not girlishly. Think about it, for that kind of person to survive Rukon, just how tough would they have to be? Yumichika won more money per fight than I did, because no one expected him to win, he proved them wrong every time. In the early days, he even beat me a few times. Don't ever forget Yumichika chose fifth seat, he could be much higher if he wanted to be."

Ichigo blinked slowly in shock, "Just how long have you two been travelling together?"

A lazy grin spread across Ikkaku's face, "Oh awhile, ever since he picked the scruffy kid out of the gutter I was dumped into after facing an opponent too far above my level. He healed me up, and then promptly reopened all the wounds when I regained consciousness and thanked the lady who treated me."

"Is Yumichika older than you?" Ichigo asked curiously, that's sure the impression he got from the story.

A fast nod, "Don't tell him I told you, or I'll be on desk duty for a month. It's the worst punishment a member of our squad can get. No sparring, no fighting at all actually, and only the mandatory amount of training allowed. For a member of the Eleventh you might as well shut us in a coffin for however long we're being punished for, and many would prefer the coffin." He explained with a shudder, and another steadying sip of sake.

"Why'd you think he was a girl? Yeah he acts a little weird, but I knew he was a guy right away." Ichigo wondered how Ikkaku was going to answer this one without risking desk duty again.

Ikkaku's deep scowl was all the confirmation Ichigo needed to realize he'd asked a difficult question, "Well his hair was down to his waist, and he was wearing one of those pretty flowered outfits I'd seen on the more well off women. In my defense I was recovering from a battle, and I had hit my head pretty hard after a not so good landing, so I wasn't seeing very clearly when I first woke up. He knows he looks a tad androgynous to most people, and plays it up one way or another to his advantage. Some places it's better to appear to be a woman, others a man."

"You didn't hit on him while you thought he was a girl did you? That could be awkward." Ichigo was still trying to picture Yumichika with long hair, and wearing something other than his modified uniform.

Taking another swing from the almost empty bottle, Ikkaku decided to blame it on the sake when he answered with the truth, "No, but I thought he was gonna kick my ass again when I hit on him after I knew the truth. I hadn't met anyone who could fight like that before, when I said he reopened my wounds, I meant all of them in less than ten seconds."

Ichigo's eyes were as wide as saucers, only to be more surprised when a resigned voice met his ears from the doorway behind them, "There are some days I wish I had, and then maybe I wouldn't still be cleaning up your messes! Next time you spar inside, it is you who is cleaning up the blood, got it?" Yumichika ordered, settling in a much more dignified seating position than the other two men.

Ikkaku drained his bottle before replying, "You're the only one who cares about a little blood on the floor in this division, that's why even as a Fifth seat you are still the one stuck cleaning it up."

Yumichika tossed his head, "Its fine to spill the blood, it is not okay to leave it there. That is all I am saying. Now care to tell me how you managed to break Ichigo when you don't even have your Zanpakuto on you?"

"I think he just figured out a few things that should have been obvious, but I guess he has been kind of busy, what with the whole stopping an execution thing." Ikkaku replied calmly, watching as Ichigo slowly pulled himself back together and his brain rebooted.

"So you two are together?" Two nods, "And you don't have to hide it?"

"Not really," Yumichika shrugged, "It's not like we run around with a big sign around our necks or anything, but we don't go out of our way to hide it either." At Ikkaku's pointed cough, he amended the statement, "Well I might be a little more obvious than Ikkaku."

"Why do you think we would want to hide it?" Ikkaku thought the question was a bit odd. Of all the things Ichigo could have asked or freaked out about, it was that? It raised a red flag of suspicion in his mind.

Classic deer in the headlights pose, guess the substitute had a few secrets he hadn't shared with the class.

Ichigo managed to recover quick enough to respond, but it was too late to take back his initial incriminating response, "Most people in the Living World chose to hide it, at least until they know people well. It was only a week ago we were trying to kill each other."

"This isn't the Living World," Yumichika reminded him. "We live a lot longer here, so while your soul doesn't change it's preference once you arrive, if you had the slightest interest in another of your own gender, the chances that side of you might find a suitable enough partner to make it worth the while to admit it grows exponentially. Even if you have only noticed a single person in your human lifetime, as a Shinigami you have centuries to run into someone like that again. In other words, among Shinigami at least, it's common to have a lover of the same sex at some point while in the Soul Society. Ikkaku and I are odd in that we have stayed together for so long, but we are by no means unique. At least not as far as relationships go." This _was _Yumichika talking, he would never admit to being less than perfectly unique personality or looks wise.

Ikkaku's grin as Yumichika's lecture ended was almost scary, at least when it was directed at Ichigo, "So Ichigo, who's managed to catch your eye? That was an odd question for someone who isn't hiding something to ask." Ikkaku was not known for subtlety, but hey, bluntness got the job done most of the time, so why waste time?

"What makes you think anyone has?" Ichigo was not about to confirm or deny Ikkaku's suspicions, at least not right away he wasn't.

Ikkaku gave him a blank stare, "You are telling me you have spent the last week fighting men and women in various levels of dress, and not a single one has caught your eye? Yeah right, if you want to keep deluding yourself, go ahead. I need more sake anyway." After that, he pulled himself to his feet, held out an arm for Yumichika to take, and sauntered back inside the barracks where a fresh bottle and an eager kiss waited for him. Yumichika hated cleaning up blood, simply because he knew if blood was on the floor, it was a good bet some of it was Ikkaku's. He never calmed down until he confirmed the man was fine, and not in some Squad Four recovery room with three people pumping healing Kido into him, it had happened before.

Ichigo caught sight of the two of them kiss, and he had to valiantly fight against the blush threatening to rise in his cheeks. They weren't even close to being as lewd as Yoruichi was after she transformed in front of him completely nude, but the simple affection between the two was almost as provocative to him.

He needed to get out of there, and fast, or he would only embarrass himself. Quickly pulling on the rest of his uniform, and swinging Zangetsu onto his back, he left the squad Eleven compound like the hounds of Hell were snapping at his heels. The only time he ever vacated faster was when Kenpachi caught up to him.

He wandered around for awhile, trying to find something to do to keep him out of trouble. He came across Uryu and Orihime trying to get Chad to pick which outfit he liked better, but Ichigo decided to steer clear of that. Ten angry guys with knives and bad attitudes hounding Chad and Ichigo was right there fighting back to back, two slightly crazed people armed with sewing kits and fabric swatches meant he was on his own.

Ichigo eventually found himself passing another squad's compound, the bold number six above the arched entranceway had him turning in as he followed a half formed idea about seeing Renji, or maybe Rukia since he didn't know if the girl would be with her own squad or hounding her brother.

He found the Captain sitting at his desk, a pile of paperwork in front of him, but it appeared the completed stack was larger than the work to be done, so hopefully the man wouldn't toss him out on his ear, "What do you want Kurosaki?" Byakuya asked as he carefully filled in another form, his hand steady and sure, even though his body was still trying to recover from the deep wound in his side.

"Do you happen to know where Renji or Rukia is? I was hoping to speak with one of them. Oh and call me Ichigo." He answered as quickly as he dared without being rude, but he didn't want to take up more of Byakuya's time than the Captain was willing to spare. Judging by past dealings, time to spare was a thing Byakuya did not care to have.

Byakuya flicked grey eyes off the page to catch a quick look at the former Ryoka, he looked a bit irritated, but he went ahead and answered anyway, "My sister is resting in our manor, she still grows tired easily from her time spent around seki seki rock, and as a result she is not to be disturbed. Lieutenant Abarai is carrying out his duties, which means he is also not to be bothered until they are completed. As for your name, you and I are not acquainted enough to drop formalities Kurosaki." Figuring that was the end of it, he turned back to the stack of papers.

Ichigo hesitated, before figuring he might as well ask the question on his mind, he was close enough to the door for an escape should Byakuya react badly, "Are you recovering all right?"

That got more than a glance from the Captain, "I fail to see how that pertains to you." Irritation flashed across his face, before his normal blank expression returned.

"If you hadn't been tired from fighting me, you might have been able to defend Rukia without injuring yourself, I consider that my fault." Ichigo replied with enough honesty Byakuya couldn't help but believe him.

Byakuya managed to fight down the anger without it showing on his face this time, but it was a close call, "Don't flatter yourself. If you must know I am healing just fine, and I simply took the best option open to me at the time. You had nothing to do with it."

"I was just checking on you, forgive me for caring Byakuya," Since Ichigo knew if the first part didn't piss him off, using his first name definitely would, he high tailed it from the office before thousands of sharp cherry blossoms could pierce into him.

Byakuya didn't look up from his papers, he was afraid if he had, Ichigo might have seen the small smirk on his lips he allowed himself when the substitute proved just how frightened he still was of Byakuya even after defeating him in battle. The Captain of the sixth held no illusions about that battle; Ichigo had won, fair and square. That terrifying incident with the creature side of him didn't change the fact it was still Kurosaki who became victorious, though it did still concern him. The type of fear Ichigo had shown by running from the office had nothing on the bone deep primal terror that had frozen Byakuya in place at the sight of the half-formed mask and cloying spirit pressure.

Finishing the work left at his desk, he pulled himself out of his chair and left the barracks heading back towards Kuchiki manor. The short encounter with Ichigo had brought up a few questions in his head, and he knew just the person to ask. To his luck, she was even awake when he made it home. He wouldn't have disturbed her rest just to get those answers, but since she wasn't resting now, it was as good a time as any.

"Brother, finished with your work already?" Rukia was pulling herself upright the moment she saw her brother walk through the door.

Byakuya nodded, "Yes, the paperwork is complete concerning the damages taken during Aizen's retreat. I thought it would be good to spend the evening together. Have you rested enough to have dinner with me tonight?" They really hadn't spent much time together since their mutual release from the Fourth division.

"Yes, I've rested plenty. I think I'm starting to get better, I haven't needed nearly as much sleep in the last few days." She reported.

"I am glad to hear you are recovering well." He still spoke formally, but she could hear the genuine concern in his voice, a skill earned through practice in reading her stoic brother. "You have a little time to freshen up before the meal is served, please meet me in the dining room when you are ready."

Rukia nodded, tossing the covers aside, clutching the front of her yukata closed, "It won't take me long. I'll be there soon."

He left her to give her the time she needed, taking advantage of the moment to slip out of his Captain's haori and uniform, removing his arm guards, scarf, and kenseikan along with them. He rarely stayed in full uniform while at home, but he was even more relaxed than usual heading towards the dining room dressed in dark blue. He wanted the chance to talk to Rukia one on one, without his title getting in the way. There was a lot they needed to work through, and Kurosaki was only one aspect.

The beginning of the meal went well; they kept to safe subjects, but quickly ran out of those and ended up sitting in silence for several minutes. Rukia knew her brother had something specific in mind to talk about for him to extend this invitation, and noticing his reluctance she decided he could use a bit of prompting, "Is something bothering you Brother?" That was a nice open ended question, that he could answer in several ways without investing too much if he wasn't ready.

"I had a visitor in my office today, it was Kurosaki," Byakuya informed, but had to stop there, as he wasn't quite sure how to phrase his questions.

Rukia blinked in shock a few times, that hadn't been what she was expecting at all, "Oh, Ichigo came to see you? What did he want?"

"He was looking for Abarai or you, but when I informed him the both of you were unavailable he began speaking to me instead. Something he said caught my attention. After inquiring about my own recovery he admitted to believing he was the root cause of my having been wounded while protecting you. He thinks it was his fault, that had I been less distracted and worn from our previous battle I might have avoided injury. Do you know why he would make such a claim? I did what needed to be done; I don't see why he believes he was at fault unless he is frighteningly arrogant." Byakuya believed that was an acceptable way of expressing his thoughts.

Rukia knew this would have to be handled carefully, there was only so much her elder brother would accept at one time, but she didn't want him simply dismissing Ichigo either. This was her chance to maybe get the two of them to see each other on a more equal footing now that they were off the battlefield. "He wasn't being arrogant. Ichigo is very straightforward in the way he acts, and he doesn't like seeing people get hurt if there is something he can do to prevent it. He made a promise to someone very important to him that he would always protect those that needed protecting. Someone on his side of the fight was seriously injured when he was only a few steps away, he sees that as his own failure. He guilt trips himself very easily, if he told you he thought it was his fault, he meant it."

"We were battling not five minutes before the defection, how could he feel guilt about my wounding? He should have been rejoicing that his opponent was brought down without him having to finish the kill himself." Byakuya was having trouble accepting Rukia's words, he knew she wouldn't lie to him, but it just didn't fit together in his head.

Rukia nibbled her lower lip in nervousness, she knew the answer, but doubted he would like it, "Ichigo wouldn't have killed you. Notice in all his battles after arriving in the Seireitei, no one died. He could have killed them, but he didn't. Ichigo will fight to protect, but he doesn't kill, especially not those that are just doing their duty or following orders. He had figured out if he couldn't reason with you, he would have to stop you by force but that was as far as he would have gone. You are my brother, he might not have known all the details of the adoption, but he knew I would be hurt if something happened to you. He adapts to new situations easily so while you wouldn't have been killed in any event, once Aizen showed his true colors, you immediately became one of the people Ichigo identified as his comrade. In other words, you became something to protect."

Byakuya remained silent for awhile after that, the siblings finishing their meal before it grew too cold as he thought through what he had been told. So Kurosaki thought he was something that needed protecting? That was demeaning in a way Byakuya hadn't felt since his youth spent standing in his grandfather's shadow. He was a Captain in the Gotei Thirteen. He did not need protected by a fifteen-year-old boy. A shiver threatened to overtake him at the memory of the monster he had fought those few minutes hidden inside his Bankai. Okay so a fifteen-year-old boy possessed by a demon, but still, the sentiment was the same.

"You have the same look on your face I did, when he broke out of my restraining spell _before_ I transferred my power to him. You don't believe it's possible that someone so young could see you as someone to protect, am I right?" Rukia analyzed accurately, breaking Byakuya out of his silence.

"A Captain does not need to be protected by a Ryoka trouble maker." Byakuya confirmed.

Rukia smiled softly, "Ichigo doesn't care about titles. He cares about people. He saw you get hurt, that proved that even the strong Captain could have used some help. Rank means nothing, or age, or ability, just if you are close to him, and in trouble, you are under his protection. It is that simple. I wasn't gone long enough for him to come rescue me out of love or any great affection, we are good friends, but that normally wouldn't be enough to take on a full army with five people and a cat. He rescued me because he thought it was the right thing to do."

"Why? You said he made a promise to someone special. What could be so important he would throw himself into this whole heartedly?" Maybe if he had that answer the pieces would fall into place.

Rukia sighed softly, she had hoped she wouldn't have to answer this question, "Understand I am only telling you this because I think it would help the two of you understand each other a little better. Ichigo fights so hard to protect people, because of the one person he couldn't protect when he was a child. He was nine years old when his mother was killed by a Hollow in front of his eyes, she had been trying to protect him at the time. He could see spirits as a human, and the Grand Fisher caught him in his trap, his mother died while he survived. He has felt guilt for her death ever since. That is why he works so hard to protect people, even if they are not very familiar to him yet."

"So there is more to him than a hot-headed melee fighter." Byakuya spoke softly, but Rukia still heard him.

"Yes. I haven't met anyone in this world or the world of the living quite like Ichigo, though the two of you do come close. He is more impulsive, but I can see him calming down in a few years and being very similar." Rukia agreed, adding on the last part after figuring if he had handled everything else so well, one more observation couldn't hurt. It might even get him started thinking more on the mature aspects of Ichigo and not the reckless youth.

He felt guilt hearing her say that. "Rukia I am going to need to think on this for awhile. He managed to catch my interest, and he took care of you when I didn't so I owe him." He rose gracefully from his place at the table, reaching the door before turning back to her, "I am sorry Rukia I made the wrong choice. He pointed that out to me."

Byakuya left the dining room, a look of shock firmly plastered on his sister's face.

He walked the familiar path to the altar with Hisana's picture placed prominently on it. The woman he had loved so deeply, and watched slip away to disease without him being able to do anything. He took his place kneeling before the image, gazing up at her while he attempted to assimilate every thing.

Kurosaki had watched his mother die to protect him. Such a young child witnessed a horrific incident, and instead of growing callus and angry, became a protector for those around him. He blamed himself for the death, and was attempting to repay the debt he felt he owed by saving all those he could, but since it was his own mind punishing itself he would never be free of the guilt.

It was a trap Byakuya was familiar with. He felt so helpless as his wife fell deeper and deeper into sickness. Growing so weak she could no longer carry out her search for the precious item that had been lost. She had only revealed to him the exact nature of her search when she could no longer do it herself. It was too late by then. He hadn't been able to reunite the sister's before Hisana passed, to give her even that much comfort.

He knew guilt, and Rukia must have at least guessed that much, or she never would have told him something so deeply personal about Kurosaki unless she was sure he wouldn't use it against the boy.

Was that the reason the boy had the monster growing inside him? Was it a side effect of all that grief and guilt? Spiritual Pressure could do odd things to a living soul. Grief, guilt, pain, and loss were the recipe to make a Hollow out of a Whole soul. What did that kind of strain do to a soul still anchored to a living body? Was Kurosaki really so strong willed that when Byakuya himself had severed his soul chain, he had managed to hold off a Hollowfication so only a portion of his true soul was lost?

Byakuya was young, but he had been around for the exile of seven Captains and four Lieutenants all at the same time. He had listened at the council room door as his Grandfather briefed the family. A whispered word had been spread around that council room, and the Seireitei in general as time went on. Hollowfication. There had been experiments conducted to see if there could be a viable blending of Soul Reapers and Hollows. Eight of the people in question were the victims of the experiment, two were accomplices in spiriting the eight away, and one man was charged with the crime. Kisuke Urahara.

The same man Ichigo claimed to have taught him. That little rumor had been spreading ever since the fight on Sokyoku hill, once Ikkaku of squad eleven knew Ichigo really wasn't a threat, he started expounded on their fight, and that detail was one of the things he spoke about. Ichigo Kurosaki the Ryoka had one of the most infamous names in the Gotei 13 for a teacher.

Byakuya was interested in Kurosaki all right. He wanted to know more about him. It was an interesting puzzle. He sat there thinking until late in the night. The candles burning low while a steady stream of smoke and a light scent drifted on the wind from the incense smoldering on the altar, Hisana, looking so much like Rukia, overlooking his contemplation.

On the other side of the Seireitei, a muscled body bared to the waist twisted and moved agilely through one of the squad eleven training yards. His long cleaver appearing Zanpakuto clenched in his hand, attacking the targets set up at random intervals through the arena. He didn't use Bankai, or Getsuga, this was about him and his sword.

The thing was back. Screaming in his head. The bloodthirsty monster wanted a fight, was pushing him towards battle. These bloodless targets doing little to ease the tension, but Ichigo refused to give in to the monster's demands. He kept fighting and moving under the moonlight. Working until the screams dimmed and he felt nothing but his own heartbeat and ragged breathing.

He ran from the presence in his head. Hiding from the frightening reality, he wrapped himself in the protection Zangetsu offered, merging with the spirit of his sword until nothing but the two of them mattered. No matter how much the beast raged and howled to be free, there was nothing the menace could do against their combined will. Soon there could be no more pushing him back, but for now Ichigo let those thoughts go and simply fought.

The moon shone down gently upon both hurting men, and beneath her soft glow, the two souls cried out to be free from their pain. If only for a moment.


	2. Your Heaven is a Lie

**Heaven is a Lie**

**Shadow of an Echo**

****A/N sorry about the wait, a lot of personal stuff on top of writers block, but I know where I am going with the story and I have three weeks off work before my next appointment to work on my stories.

**Part Two**

**Your Heaven Is a Lie**

"A team must be assembled. The living world is primed for an invasion and we must hold these Arrancar off. Those sent will be working in close quarters with the Substitute Soul Reaper Ichigo Kurosaki." Head Captain Yamamoto laid out his orders to the assembled Captains and Lieutenants.

The number in front of him used to be 25 including his own Lieutenant, now it was just 21. He scanned the waiting faces slowly, some showing more patience than others. His thoughts made up, he finished his appointing, "I would like the Lieutenants from Squad 6 and Squad 10 to go, as well as Officer level representatives from Squad 4 and Squad 11. Captain Unohana, and Captain Zaraki please select your best candidates for this mission, I will leave the final decision in your hands. Captain Ukitake, your squad member Rukia Kuchiki has the most resent experience with the area of the Living World in question, she will also accompany the team. I will appoint one Captain to head this mission, is there any volunteers?" He wasn't expecting a positive response to his last question, asking it out of formality, and was about to name Hitsugaya when one of his flock did speak up shocking most of those present.

"I will go to the Living World," Byakuya spoke clearly, and without hesitation, sounding every inch the noble he was.

Yamamoto contained his surprise at that, asking in an even tone, "That is highly unusual for you, what is your reasoning Captain Kuchiki?"

"My sister nearly died from her last trip to the Living World dealing with Ichigo Kurosaki. I will lead the team and watch over her," Byakuya explained truthfully, knowing the ancient man would catch any lie he tried to use to cover his motivations.

With that decided Yamamoto gave his final orders. "Very well, you have my approval, all Shinigami assigned to this mission will meet here in 24 hours and will leave for the Living World in one group. Captain Kurotsuchi, please have the necessary materials on hand for the power seals, and be here to apply them before the team leaves."

Byakuya left the meeting room calmly, ignoring the curious gazes of his fellow Captains. He knew what he had just done was odd, even for the 13 court guard squads. The Captain of the Sixth willingly sending himself to the Living World? He had just fed the rumor mills for the coming months with a single action.

Nevertheless, he wouldn't take it back, even now when the moment was over. His sister and lieutenant needed to be watched over. Rukia had nearly been executed the last time he let her go into the Living World without him, and Renji was such a hot head he would need someone tough enough to rein him in. His Lieutenant's strength was his weakness, he had bouts of overconfidence that could get him in trouble, especially if Kido was involved at all.

Now he just had to survive the mission without losing his temper, with the combination of people going, he wondered how difficult it would end up being to achieve that objective.

His gigai felt suffocating, he hadn't used one in such a long time the confinement made him feel like he couldn't breathe. The blue jeans and t-shirt Urahara had dressed it in felt stiff and foreign after so long in the same loose clothing. He felt under dressed without his scarf or arm guards; at least he was allowed his Kenseikan.

The hairpieces did garner the occasional odd look, but he ignored them as he walked down the street. He normally avoided being too visible in the daylight hours, preferring to patrol at night when the Arrancar and Hollows were more likely to attack. This was a special occasion though, he was needed, even if he wasn't quite sure what he could do to help yet.

Ichigo had an encounter with the encroaching enemy. An encounter that left him wounded and out of the patrol rotations for a few days at least while his body healed. Rukia had confessed to him her worry for the rash young man, and Byakuya felt it was his duty to check on him for her and see for himself what could be done to improve the situation.

As much as Byakuya didn't want to admit it, they needed Ichigo. He was simply too strong to be taken down in a single skirmish when the real battle was looming on the horizon.

If there was something to spur the Shinigami back into fighting shape, it had to be done, and soon.

The Kurosaki residence was rowdy and alive, that was what Rukia had reported and what Byakuya had been expecting, instead he was met by a subdued brunette girl, probably in her early teens if he had to guess. "Excuse me I need to speak with Ichigo Kurosaki, is he home?" He requested politely, if a bit stiffly.

The girl got a slightly more worried look on her face, "Brother is home, but he hasn't been feeling well. Is it important?"

"I think he needs to hear what I have to say, I will try to be quick and not upset him," Byakuya replied, hoping the girl would let him see Ichigo. He had a little too much pride to be sneaking into windows like a burglar.

She opened the door further and allowed him in, "All right, as long as you're careful. I'm Yuzu by the way, Ichigo's little sister."

"Nice to meet you Yuzu, I will do my best," A little reassurance wouldn't hurt, and he didn't think even his uptight family would get ruffled feathers over him showing a small measure of kindness to a young girl.

Sometimes all the rules he had to follow grated on his nerves, but he pushed the slight irritation away as Yuzu led him to Ichigo's room. A short exchange ensued, and soon he was allowed inside the simple bedroom, and left alone with the recently defeated warrior.

When Ichigo saw who entered his room, he attempted to scramble upright to cover the fact he had been spread out on the bed wearing nothing but loose shorts and bandages, but soon fell back with a soft groan of pain. "What do you want Byakuya?" He asked warily, ending his attempts to appear more dignified. It was bad enough he was defeated, now he had to face the icy Captain on top of that, he was definitely not having a good day.

"You have first hand information about our new enemy, I need to hear what happened," Byakuya didn't comment on the use of his full name yet, he would give the obviously injured man a little leeway, but he doubted his patience would hold for long on the issue.

"Two Arrancar arrived on the edge of town, they attacked humans first before I knew they had arrived, by the time I got there Chad and Orihime were already injured. We fought, I lost, they went back to Heuco Mundo. Orihime was too injured to heal us, so Urahara did what he could, and now you're here." Ichigo explained shortly, turning his head and staring out the window so he wouldn't have to face the Captain while he admitted his defeat.

Byakuya glanced around the small room, and finding the only chair, settled in gracefully as this might take a bit to get the full story worked out of him, "That isn't all the information I need. What were the Arrancar's abilities? Their power level? Were you fighting in Shikai or Bankai? Did they say anything, or did anything else unusual happen in the fight?" It was a lot of questions, but he needed the answers.

Ichigo stared out the window and recounted the encounter with Ulquiorra and Yammy, using as little inflection as he could get away with. The images of Tatsuki, Orihime, and Chad beaten and unconscious wouldn't leave his head, the rage he felt at seeing their defeat paled in comparison to the shame that overcame him at his inability to protect them. He was the strongest, the protector, it was up to him to keep his friends and neighbors safe, and he had failed.

Byakuya watched all this pass across his face even as he took in the information being relayed. Ichigo might not let much pass into his voice, but his eyes told the whole story. He never could keep everything to himself, his eyes told the story of his pain to anyone who thought to look for it.

He understood pain, so he went with the lesser emotion he saw, "You are afraid of something, not of the Arrancar; something else. What has you concerned?" He noticed the flash of fear and reluctance at certain points in the story, Kurosaki wasn't afraid of the intruders, he was afraid of his own power and Byakuya just had to find out why.

"You fought me, you should know," Ichigo eventually admitted, not liking being forced into a corner, but while he was a Substitute Shinigami he was subject to the rules of the Seireitei, and right now Byakuya was the highest ranked Officer in the vicinity, he didn't have a choice but to respond.

"I have an idea, but I want to hear it from you," Of course Byakuya remembered the creature that had momentarily overtaken Kurosaki during their fight.

An angry growl, almost so quiet Byakuya didn't catch it, but finally Ichigo spit it out. "There is a dangerous part of myself. If I get too worked up he tries to break free, and unlike me, he wont hesitate to kill."

The Captain had been expecting something like that, "Do you even know what it is?" If Kurosaki didn't know what he was fighting against, he didn't have a chance of beating it.

"I think so, but I am not sure," Ichigo wasn't quite willing to admit the reason he was alive was because he fought off the Hollowfication process, and unfortunately he didn't think he was completely successful.

Byakuya shook his head, silky black strands moving against the smooth cotton of his shirt, "You do know, you just don't want to tell me."

"How do you know that?" Ichigo challenged.

A slightly raised eyebrow, "I am a Captain of the Seireitei, do you honestly think this is the first time someone has attempted to lie to me? Better liars than you have tried, and they failed just the same as you. It would be better for you in the long run to simply tell me the truth, my other means of finding answers are not nearly so pleasant." He threatened vaguely, hoping he wouldn't be called on it. Ichigo had beaten him when he had full access to his power, here with the limiter on his skin he wouldn't win even if the creature in Kurosaki stayed dormant, he hoped the boy didn't know that though.

Ichigo let out a defeated laugh, talking evenly as he responded, "You might as well know, it is mostly your fault anyway. If you had just killed me this wouldn't have happened, but no, you had to be cruel. You severed my soul chain, which admittedly would have killed me, but Kisuke got there first. You do know what happens to Souls that are unattached to this world right? The remaining links encroach slowly back to where the chain connects to your soul, when it hits your chest the soul becomes a Hollow. The only way to avoid becoming a Hollow, is to become a Soul Reaper, which I was able to do. I didn't manage it until my chain was already gone, fortunately for me instead of the Hollow hole appearing first, my mask started forming. When I climbed out of the pit Kisuke had thrown me into I had my Zanpakuto, a Shihakusho, and my mask. I tried to get rid of the mask, but it kept coming back. It followed me around the whole time I was in Soul Society, if it weren't for the mask Renji would have killed me by the way, and when I fought you, I felt something else stir and come forward. I think part of me has become a Hollow, I can almost control him, but he fights me every time there is a battle. I don't know what will happen if I lose."

"You are not the first," Byakuya informed him, with his suspicions confirmed he could do more for Kurosaki. "When I was very young, we lost several Captains and Lieutenants in one night, I overheard my Grandfather telling the family heads what had happened. They had been partially Hollowfied, just like you were, and they were ordered destroyed. They escaped with the help of three other Captains, they live somewhere in the Living World, but they hide well."

"So if Soul Society found out about me I would be executed? Guess I only have until you file your report before I die." A statement like that should not have been spoken so matter of factly, the emotional void Kurosaki was prone to reminded Byakuya a bit of his own shut down after Hisana's death. He knew that was no way to live.

"Who said I was going to include this in a report?" Byakuya questioned.

"You always uphold the rules, something like this, I doubt you would let it slide." Ichigo pointed out.

"I don't always. You taught me that. I owe you a debt for protecting my sister when I didn't, I will not include this in any report on one condition." The Captain was willing to compromise, but only so far, he did owe Ichigo a rather big debt.

Ichigo was wary of accepting this outright, "What is the condition?"

"You must prove to me you have your Hollow under control. Show me that, and I will keep this out of the formal reports." Byakuya informed him. He had a double motive here, yes he wanted to make sure Kurosaki wasn't a threat, but if Ichigo gained control over his Hollow he would be even stronger and they would need that strength for the coming battle.

Ichigo let out a small sigh, "And how exactly do you suggest I do that?"

"Simple, track down the original Visoreds, learn from them." Byakuya hadn't expected to have to spell it out for him, but he would if he needed to.

Another humorless laugh, "And how do I find them? I suck at sensing Spirit Pressure, if Soul Society couldn't find them, how do you expect me to?"

"Your mentor honestly didn't tell you why he was exiled?" He was surprised at that, figuring Urahara would at least let his student know that much, but a secret that big had to be shared carefully.

"No, are you going to tell me?" Ichigo asked curiously.

"Kisuke Urahara, Tessai Tsukabishi, and Yoruichi Shihouin were the three Captains responsible for breaking the condemned Officers out of Soul Society, and what's more Urahara was the one charged for the crime. Though with the recent developments I have my doubts. With Aizen's power revealed I went through the old trial transcripts that mentioned his name, and Kisuke's did. He insisted it was Aizen's doing that created the Hollowfied officers, but the Lieutenant was seen working in the Seireitei at the same time as the incident was occurring and was cleared. If he could fake his death so thoroughly then it would be a simple thing to have a project wonder the Seireitei while he fought with Urahara." Byakuya theorized.

Out of all that, Ichigo had one question, "How did you find those transcripts? They couldn't be easy to find."

"It was easy for me, the Sixth squad is the one that collects and catalogs the transcripts, while the Second squad enforces the rules we keep the histories. Why do you think I am so driven by the rules? I have always been raised to uphold and honor them. My Grandfather was Captain of the Sixth before me, and he raised me." Ichigo had revealed so much to him, it was time to repay it with a little personal information of his own.

"I think I need to visit a certain shop. Someone has a lot to answer for." Ichigo finally replied.

"I will go with you, if he attempts to avoid talking, I can force him. He doesn't want to be reported any more than the Visoreds do." Byakuya decided.

"Give me a few moments to change, the sooner we take care of this the better, if you would like Yuzu could probably use some company. Dad is working late in the Clinic and Karin has soccer practice." Ichigo didn't like how much time his youngest sister spent alone, and despite their problems, he trusted Byakuya around her.

"She seems like a good girl, I wouldn't mind speaking more with her," Byakuya admitted, he did like children, he just wasn't used to showing emotion to anyone.

With that Ichigo pulled himself painfully off the bed, and Byakuya left the room to give him some privacy. He found the girl who let him in the house in the kitchen; she had cooked a meal, but was eating alone. "Oh hello, have you eaten yet? I made enough if you would like to join me you can." She offered, quickly getting up and retrieving another set of dishes while waiting for his answer.

Even Byakuya didn't have the heart to refuse her, "I wouldn't mind a little food, and Ichigo will be down in a few minutes. He agreed some fresh air would be good for him, we will be going out for a walk later." He settled gracefully into a chair at the table, where she had already laid out the dishes she retrieved.

"You managed to get him to come out of his room? I was so worried about him, Karin and Ichigo are the same, they never say anything when they are hurting. It upsets Dad and I, we can't help them if they won't let us." She complained quietly while serving a small portion of rice and stew for him. She would get Ichigo's plate ready when he came down, she wanted the meal to be warm for him.

Byakuya wasn't quite sure how to respond to that, but he had to try. "I don't know Karin, but Ichigo is the type to take care of everyone else, he wouldn't want you to worry about him."

"I wish he would realize that letting us take care of him would make us worry less. He has been hurting for so long, I just want to help." She pressed, not hearing the footsteps coming down from Ichigo's room.

His soothing voice washed over her, and she had to hold back tears, "You do help me Yuzu. Karin, Dad, and you, all three of you help me every day. You took over for mom when the rest of us were still a mess, you made sure we ate, had clean clothes, and even forced dad into the shower more than once. You were so little, you should never have had to take that on." Yes, Ichigo knew Byakuya was listening, but he didn't care, his sister was more important than his ego.

She launched herself into his arms, and even with the pain of his injuries he held her tightly, "I did what I had to. You saw her die, Karin and I only remember her a little bit, and they are all good memories. You saw her death, and Dad had to deal with the aftermath, don't think Karin and I don't know what that meant. Taking care of you was nothing compared to what you saw."

"You should hate me, all of you, it is my fault she died. The thing that killed her was after me, she wouldn't have died if it weren't for me." Ichigo couldn't say that any louder than whisper, but the words carried to the Shinigami Captain sitting at the table unsure of what to do.

"Kurosaki, it wasn't your fault. Death would have found her had you been there or not. She left her legacy in the family she created, don't dishonor her memory by drowning in the grief of her death when it would be better to celebrate her life." The pain of Hisana's death was like a wound that refused to close, he understood the consuming power of grief, but Ichigo's mother had left something precious behind, and Kurosaki needed to see that.

"We never blamed you Ichigo, the only one who did was you." Yuzu agreed, realizing the man that had come to see her brother was a lot more than he appeared. She couldn't see spirits like her sister and brother could, but she could sense the living, and this one was very odd. He had a presence so bright she could barely look directly at him, but at the same time, it was constrained and contained in his body, as if it was caged. She had seen something similar, but not quite to that extent, in the girl Ichigo had ran into at their mother's grave.

"You don't know the whole story, it really was me," Ichigo insisted, hating himself for so long, he refused to change that opinion. He was right and he knew it.

"She might not, but I do, let me repeat. It was not your fault." Byakuya spoke a little more forcibly, if he could only get through to him he might keep Ichigo from feeling as much pain as he had.

"Oh, and how do you know?" Ichigo demanded.

"Rukia," He replied shortly. "She told me, to explain why you would think my wound was your fault. You carry far too much guilt, it isn't good for your soul."

"What would you know about it?" Ichigo shot back angrily, holding onto his sister a little tighter, she allowed it knowing he was being forced to work through something old and painful.

"Do you know why the Kuchiki family adopted Rukia?" He asked quietly.

"No, I didn't get to talk to her about it." Ichigo admitted, wondering where this was going, he still hadn't let go of Yuzu.

"She wasn't my sister, I think you know that, she was my wife's. Hisana was always searching for something in the Rukon districts, she would never tell me what it was she was looking for, but just about every day she would take a walk and try to find whatever it was. She grew ill, very ill, and finally could no longer continue her search on her own. She at last confided in me, about the sister she was forced to leave behind. Rukia was that girl. I did not find her until after Hisana died, so I lied and told her I adopted her because they looked similar, I didn't tell her she was related to Hisana until that day on Sokyoku hill. I watched my wife die, and was unable to do anything to ease her passing, I couldn't even do that one thing she wanted most, to be reunited with her sister. I know grief, and I know pain, don't let it consume you, not while you have your family here with you." It hurt to say it all, but he knew Ichigo's darkest secrets, it was time to return some of the trust he hadn't even known was given.

"Ichigo, brother, whatever you need to do to help yourself over this, go do it. We will be here when you get back, be careful and take care of yourself for us." Yuzu told him, holding him a bit tighter before letting go.

He felt her warmth leave him and it hurt, he had forgotten what it felt like to just hug his little sister. He had closed himself down so far while he was grieving he never thought how it would affect them. "I will try Yuzu, I will do what I can to be here for you and Karin, and dad." Ichigo promised.

"Good," She responded, "But before you go, come eat your dinner before it gets cold."

Ichigo treated her to a rare smile at the expected comment, and the three unlikely companions sat down to the meal she had prepared. He hadn't missed what Byakuya said, or that Yuzu seemed to know there was far more going on than he had told the family, but for now he wasn't ready to confront it.


	3. Update Information

Unfortunately this is not a new chapter, but it is an update of sorts. I have gotten some very bad news. I have been diagnosed with Epilepsy. There will be a lot of changes in my life including lots of doctors, pills, and a shiny new medic alert ID around my neck. I went to the doctor this summer for a completely different problem and it lead them to this, but tracing it back I've probably had it since childhood, just didn't know it.

What these means for my stories is I may not be updating for awhile, or I may be inspired and need to distract myself and you could get flooded with chapters, I don't know yet. Please be patient with me while I adjust to the changes I need to make.

Thank you so much for reading and enjoying my stories, it is very much appreciated,

Shadow of an Echo


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